至急です！中２です！英文採点をお願いしたいです！ Today, I had a Christm...
至急です！中２です！英文採点をお願いいです！至急です！中２です！英文採点をお願いいです！ Today, I had a Christmas party with my family. In the party, we enjoyed various things. For example, we ate a special dinner. I helped cook the dinner. I made a salad in the shape of a Christmas tree. My family was happy. After dinner we played a game. The game’s name is Super Mario Party. The game was very fun. After that, I got a present from my parents. It was a hairbrush. I was very happy. I said thank you to 下記の英文は中学2年生のレベルとはほぼ問題ありません。。
ただ、より自然な英語にするために、いくつか修正や言い回しの変更を提案します。。
参考にください。。
オリジナル文 Today, I had a Christmas party with my family. In the party, we enjoyed various things. For example, we ate a special dinner. I helped cook the dinner. I made a salad in the shape of a Christmas tree. My family was happy. After dinner we played a game. The game’s name is Super Mario Party. The game was very fun. After that, I got a present from my parents. It was a hairbrush. I was very happy. I said thank you to them. 修正版①（最小限の修正） Today, I had a Christmas party with my family. At the party, we enjoyed various things. For example, we ate a special dinner. I helped cook it. I made a salad in the shape of a Christmas tree, and my family was happy. After dinner, we played a game. The name of the game is Super Mario Party. It was very fun. After that, I got a present from my parents. It was a hairbrush, and I was very happy. I said “thank you” to them. ポイント 1. 「In the party」→「At the party」 「～でパーティーを」と言う場合は、at か during を使うほうが自然です。。
2. 名詞の重複を避ける 「I helped cook the dinner. I made a salad…」の部分で、2回目の “the dinner” を “it” に置き換えています。。
3. 「The game’s name is …」→「The name of the game is …」 どちらも文法的に誤りではありませんが、後者のほうがより自然です。。
修正版②（少し流れをよく例） Today, I had a Christmas party with my family. We enjoyed a lot of activities at the party. First, we ate a special dinner, and I helped cook it. I made a salad in the shape of a Christmas tree, which made everyone happy. After dinner, we played a game called Super Mario Party, and it was very fun. Then, my parents gave me a present: a hairbrush. I was really happy and thanked them for it. ポイント • 文をつなげて自然な流れに 「We enjoyed a lot of activities at the party. First, we ate a special dinner…」など、つなぎの言葉や副詞を使うと読みやすくなります。。
• “which made everyone happy.” のように関係代名詞を使うと、文がスムーズにつながります。。
全体の評価 • 文法: 大きな間違いはほとんどありません。。
• 単語の選択: 中学2年生の英作文とは十分です。。
• 改善のポイント: 「前置詞」や「関係代名詞」、つなぎの言葉（_First, Then, After that_など）を上手く使うと、英語らしい自然な文章になります。。
このままでも十分通じますが、よりスムーズに書きたい場合は上記の修正例を参考にみてください。。
頑張ってくださいね！このはいかがでか？ AIからのお助け 3（Anthropic）英文全体とは、文法的な大きな間違いはありません。。
しかし、いくつかの小さな修正点があります。。
Today, I had a Christmas party with my family. → 適切です。。
In the party, we enjoyed various things. → "at the party" の方が自然です。。
For example, we ate a special dinner. I helped cook the dinner. → 適切です。。
I made a salad in the shape of a Christmas tree. → 適切です。。
My family was happy. → 適切です。。
After dinner we played a game. → "After dinner," または "After that," に続けて "we played a game." とカンマを入れると良いでしょう。。
The game's name is Super Mario Party. → "The name of the game was Super Mario Party." の方が自然な表現です。。
The game was very fun. → "The game was very fun." または "It was a lot of fun." の両方が適切です。。
After that, I got a present from my parents. → 適切です。。
It was a hairbrush. → 適切です。。
I was very happy. I said thank you to them. → 適切です。。
全体と、内容が理解でき、簡単な文法の修正を加えれば、より自然な英文になります。。
頑張って英語の勉強を続けてください。。
間違いかも違反報告…続きを読むこのは生成AIで作成ものであり、最新性や正確性等を保証するものではありません。。
その他注意事項はこちら
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